Why You Need to Stop Trying So Hard

Image Why You Need to Stop Trying so Hard

Relationships and Dating…. “It was never supposed to be this hard”

You hear that line from a good number of songs on the radio and you might have had your mum or dad say that to you when you experienced heartbreak when you were younger. The thing is, this line is the most disregarded advice that people receive from their family and friends.

You should never try too hard in love. That’s the whole point of love. People seem to think that love is something you really have to work hard for in order to work. This can be true to some extent maybe but it is not always true – especially when you are still dating. It’s a whole different story when it comes to marriage and a long-term relationships, as time goes on there were be tests, in the early days it should be easy and effortless.

Do you really have to go through an obstacle course of emotional pain and suffering in order to find true love? I don’t think so. Do you really have to work hard to find true love? Certainly not at all. The secret? To relax and be the best version of you!

First, you have to remember that the dating game and love is not a competition. There is no first place prize for the person who works the hardest. You don’t get true love for working hard 8 hours a day plus overtime. It’s not a savings account where you deposit effort and expect returns in the end.

Next, forget the rules. Quit reading all those magazines that tell you what to do. Forget all those rules and guidelines you might have remembered from years before. The rules just makes everything harder. This is the one reason why a lot of people fail in dating. They think that by following a set number of rules, they can make something happen. If nothing happens, they automatically think that there is something wrong with them. Just a heads up, the rules are wrong. They may have worked for a handful of people but it does not mean it becomes a universal truth right away.

Look at it this way. What if you tell yourself that you don’t really have to make an effort to go out there and put on a show for everybody? What if you believe deep inside that it is your birth right to attract true love and the right person?

Because the thing is, you deserve nothing less.

Which brings us back to the most important thing, you. You are a wonderful person. You are worthy of somebody’s effort and time. Don’t forget that although you might have your flaws and imperfections, trust me we all do, there will always be that one person out there who will take all the good with the bad and see you as a perfectly imperfect just as you will see them the same way. You deserve nothing less than that.
So take a step back, recheck all your moves, and relax. Don’t push too hard and don’t strain yourself. If you feel lighter then you are doing a good job. You should feel the difference of pushing yourself and relaxing when looking for love. With this mind-set and a willing heart, you will be on the right track for love.

Just remember to be yourself, open your heart and your mind and believe that love will come your way, before you know it, it will.

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Samantha Jayne

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