By Ernst: Putting yourself first is often something that is extremely difficult for many people. From a young age, we learn that we have to be there for someone else, to be kind and to help. But as we get older, we find this more and more difficult. It seems all we do is take care of someone else and make someone else happy. But who is there for you?
If you’re in situations where you don’t feel comfortable, it’s important to look at yourself and ask yourself what you can do to start feeling good. After all, if you don’t feel good about yourself, you can’t take care of someone else either. No one is more important than you. It all starts with yourself. If you create a situation in which you feel good about yourself and your life, you can also help the people around you who may need you on their way and take good care of them.
How do you do this…. Putting yourself first?
Let me share some tips:
• Schedule time for yourself – Make an agreement with yourself to do things that make you happy is important. That gives you energy.
• Value yourself – Often you are way too hard on yourself, guilt often plays a role in this. Accept who you are because you are unique.
• Pamper yourself – Make yourself as happy as a child with little things. This also gives you energy.
• Get your R&R – Try to relax, go outside, exercise, eat tasty but healthy and spend less time behind the computer and turn off your phone.
• Think of yourself – Many things demand our attention every day, such as work, family, friends and social media. But you can also be lazy once in a while.
• Don’t feel obligated – People are often driven by things they feel they SHOULD do. Let go of that quickly because you don’t have to do anything.
I find peace in being by myself. I prefer my own place. I trust myself, I’m the only one I can rely on.
I prefer this to a friendship, love, or companionship that is full of selfishness. Some people just don’t have empathy, respect or understanding. Some people only create storms and problems instead of solutions in your life. Don’t allow that and put yourself first, without feeling guilty!
Say yes to free choice, set your limits and choose that place in your life where there are no tears. Seek and find your emotional balance and inner peace. Don’t be afraid of your own company, because that’s still a lot better than someone who drains your energy and robs you of your own identity while pretending to be the love of your life or a best friend.
Fear inhibits and does not ensure growth. Don’t be afraid to cut people out of your life, because sometimes being alone is better than insincere companionship and false love. People don’t like to be alone for various reasons. It does not mean that you have to go through life alone, but choose positive people around you who accept you as you are and keep looking at yourself, where and in which situation you feel comfortable.
If you don’t feel right, or if you are a victim in a situation, you can put yourself first! You do this because you are number one, because you are the most important person. For example, if after a long day at work you would rather lie on the couch in your jogging suit and watch your favorite TV show than go out with friends, just say so. This applies to all situations that you encounter in your life. The first time that you really take care of number one, can be very scary. You don’t really want to hurt the other person. But the other person will find it normal behavior. You will notice that it will become easier and that you will feel more and more relieved.
Look at where you are in life, where you want to go and how you can achieve this. Step-by-step. We humans want to realize everything at the same time and preferably as quickly as possible. Set your priorities and go for it.
Dare to put yourself first, there is nothing selfish about that! Put yourself on your priority list.
Love and Light,
Ernst
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